In the media recently, a pair of dating articles and a piece on plants that even you might not be able to kill. Read on…
Cry Me a River
First comes the news that men apparently suffer significantly from relationship stress. Based on a study in this month’s Journal of Health and Social Behavior, the study looked at young men and women (18-23) only, so keep in mind that this stress may partly be the drama of youth, and even the study abstract cautions about this. (Of course that hasn’t stopped the media from proclaiming “Men More Prone to Heartbreak Than Women,” which actually seems to be the opposite of the findings. Reading is fundamental…)
But even within that small age range, there’s a specific type of stress that affects men more: stress within a current relationship. Women were found to have the largest emotional swings over breakups and lack of relationships.
Essentially, this study seems to suggest men have more of a negative reaction to drama in relationships, which makes sense: women often feed on drama in their lives, while men prefer an even keel. And men apparently react to that drama by self-medicating. Hopefully, as these men get older, they might turn to meditating instead.
Girls Love Lists
Before you can stress over your relationship, you have to get one. Those overactive lasses at The Frisky have posted a new diatribe on what they don’t like about men—this time it’s a laundry list of the awful that online daters do.
Right at the top: “TMI.” I would have to agree with this one after hearing endless complaints about guys spilling their guts (sometimes to the point of tears—think the Radisson restaurant scene from Fargo). A smart guy lets the good stuff slip, but without braggadocio (the list’s #7 and #8 also cover aspects of your life you shouldn’t boast about).
Other items include #4, “The Dealbreaker,” and #5, “Body Obsessed”: dude, if you’re going to have high standards, keep them to yourself. The world will know when you’re actually seeing that incredible woman you wanted.
It does look like the Frisky ladies ran out of ideas right around #5, though. #2 (“Mr. Eager”), #6 (“Stalker Boy”), #9 (“The Black Booker”) and #10 (“Chill Out, Dude”) are basically the same guy. Yes, you should maybe carry yourself as if you have a life outside of this date, but it sounds like the authors have had an inordinate problem with overeager suitors. (You know what readers like? Author photos. Preferably in something that shows a little leg.)
If a Cactus is Too Much Work
There are multiple great reasons to maintain living things in your home. First, it shows women you’re capable of nurturing something. Second, it adds ambiance to your place—even when you’re there alone, it’s there to let you know you’re not alone. And finally, if it’s a plant, it can actually be beneficial to the air you breathe.
But what if you don’t have a lot of light in your place? Apartment Therapy offers some options that they bill as excellent low-light plants, and yes, the list includes a fern (but one with “frilly, fun leaves!”). And if that or a mint plant (decorative, and you can chew the leaves!) is too much for you, consider the ultimate suggestion of a moss terrarium. That’s right, moss.
Seriously, there’s no excuse to not have a plant or two in your place. If these are too rudimentary, check out AT‘s previous post on hard-to-kill houseplants, as well as Day 12 of my Ultimate Spring Cleaning, which has some excellent suggestions for hardy, manly greenery.
Nonmarital Romantic Relationships and Mental Health in Early Adulthood [Journal of Health and Social Behavior]
Men More Prone to Heartbreak Than Women [AOL]
Guys’ top 10 online dating mistakes [The Frisky via CNN]
5 Overlooked Plants That Can Survive The Dark (Almost) [Apartment Therapy]